See books written by Paul Pakusch at https://www.amazon.com/author/paulpakusch



Sunday, December 13, 2015

Happy Birthday to Me

Today I am the "double-nickel" 55.  I spent days trying to think of something witty, charming, or profound to mark the occasion.  I've already passed a bunch of milestone birthdays so I couldn't think of anything new to say.

And then Dear Abby came along.  Yes, I am still a fan of Dear Abby, a column I've been reading as long as I've been old enough to go beyond the comic section of newspapers.  Her message today is a message that goes beyond what the writer was looking for.  What I got out of this was, "You are as happy as you allow yourself to be, no matter what the situation.  You can't control life, but you can control how you react to it."  This can apply to ANY  situation you find yourself in.  At 55, I don't have as much time left as I once did.  I have regrets as well as proud accomplishments.  But I figure I still have a lot of time left to enjoy life, I can keep my regrets in the past (and recognize what I learned from them), and look forward to new accomplishments.

Here's today's Dear Abby column.  I really like this:

DEAR ABBY: I have been married to my amazing husband for two years. He has worked his butt off to put me through school, and I am appreciative and thankful.
He has recently been offered a promotion, which means we will have to move from the South to the Midwest. Though I'm not a fan of the idea, I agreed it would be best for us. I grew up in the North, and took the chance to move down south at 18 because I was miserable there. I hate the possibility that I'll be miserable again, and I'm afraid I may end up resenting my husband.
If he passes up this opportunity, he may not get another. How can I curb my resentment for having to move to another state I'm pretty sure I won't be happy in? -- FLORIDA GIRL, FOR NOW
DEAR FLORIDA GIRL: One way would be to recognize that you are no longer the miserable 18-year-old girl you were when you moved down south. You have matured, you have a successful marriage and you won't be returning alone. Once you relocate, involve yourself in the community so you can make new friends. And last (but not least), because people are about as happy as they make up their minds to be, decide to make the best of this opportunity and ALLOW yourself to be happy.

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